How to Talk to Someone About Their Mental Health

Each year, millions of people experience mental health challenges, yet stigma often prevents open and supportive conversations. If someone you care about is struggling, reaching out with empathy can make a real difference – but knowing how to start the conversation can feel daunting.  

Dr. Jeffrey Borenstein, President and CEO of the Brain & Behavior Research Foundation and host of the public television show Healthy Minds, says, “Talking about mental health doesn’t require perfect words—it just requires compassion. When we speak openly and without stigma, we help create a culture where it’s okay to ask for help. If you saw a friend with a broken arm, you wouldn’t hesitate to ask how they’re doing. But if that same friend seemed withdrawn, sad, or anxious—would you say anything? We need to treat mental health with the same care and concern as physical health. Sometimes, a single conversation can change—or even save—a life.”

Here are some key steps to help guide a compassionate and constructive conversation:  

1. Choose the Right Time and Place

Find a quiet, private setting where you won’t be interrupted. Avoid starting the conversation during a crisis or emotionally charged moment. Respect their space but also show you’re available when they’re ready to talk.

2. Speak from the Heart

Open with care and concern. Use nonjudgmental, supportive language such as:

• “I’ve noticed you’ve seemed down lately, and I wanted to check in. How are you doing?”
• “I care about you and want to support you in any way I can.”

Avoid minimizing their feelings or jumping to quick solutions.

3. Listen Without Judgement

Sometimes, the most meaningful thing you can do is listen. Let them speak freely without interrupting. Show empathy through body language, eye contact, and thoughtful responses like:

• “That sounds really difficult.”
• “Thank you for sharing that with me.”

4. Encourage, Don’t Pressure

If they seem open, gently suggest connecting with a mental health professional. Offer to help with research or accompany them to an appointment. However, don’t push if they’re not ready.

5. Share Trusted Resources

Having information ready can be helpful. You might suggest:

• A mental health professional or primary care doctor
• Crisis lines, such as 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline
• Support groups and trusted mental health organizations

6. Stay Connected

One conversation isn’t always enough. Continue to check in, even with small gestures – a quick text, a coffee meetup, or a walk together. These actions let them know they’re not alone.  

For more information on mental health, we invite you to view our public television series Healthy Minds with Dr. Jeffrey Borenstein. The series explores cutting edge research and features inspiring stories from experts and individuals living with mental illness – empowering viewers with knowledge, understanding, and encouragement.